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In September of last year, I moved to Virginia. I was starting over after an abusive marriage of 22 years. I’d given myself time to recover and was now dating a man named Phil, who I had been friends with for several years.
I was 39 and he was 44. I had one 22 year old daughter from my previous husband, but Phil had no children. He had been told that an illness he suffered had taken his ability to have children. I also believed I had fertility issues because the whole time I was married, I never prevented a pregnancy, yet had only conceived our daughter. I assumed that she was the only child I would ever have.
Two months after I moved to Virginia, I suspected I was pregnant. To be honest, because of my age I thought it might be menopause! But the days crept by, I became very afraid. Phil and I didn’t discuss the situation. We were both scared and unsure of what to do.
I scheduled an appointment at ComfortCare to confirm the pregnancy. In the meantime, fear began to assault Phil and me. Phil confided that he wasn’t sure he could be a good father. You realize that he was 44 years old and very set in his life with no children.
I also experienced fear. I realized I would be an older mother and worried about the health of the baby. Abortion started to become an option. I never believed in abortion, except in extreme circumstances, but now that fear was hitting me in the face, it seemed the only option.
The day of my ComfortCare appointment arrived, and I went by myself because Phil had to work. I met with my counselor, Virginia. Instantly, I knew this was a place where I would be cared for. I just felt it as I entered that building. These people cared about me and my situation. They felt like friends. I didn’t feel pressured in any way. I knew they cared for me regardless of the decision I made.
As Virginia explained fetal development, I was transfixed. Then, she said the words that will forever change my life.
“Your baby has a heart beat.” I was overwhelmed with tears. My baby had a heart beat? I didn’t know that. No one ever told me that a fetus so young had a heart beat. I truly didn’t know. Those words changed my life. I knew at that moment, I could not abort my baby.
I asked Virginia to explain abortion procedures and she did. I couldn’t stop crying. I knew I couldn’t have an abortion but nothing outside of that counseling room had changed. All my problems still existed. I wasn’t sure what to do next.
All of the women at ComfortCare were so kind to me. They made sure that I was at a comfort point before I left. They
gave me tissues. They waited patiently. Virginia even invited me to her church. They cared about me, and I knew they were going to be there for me.
When I got home, I told Phil about my appointment. He was still filled with fear and wanted me to call the abortion clinic. Something inside me said to do it- to make that call. I just knew that he would hear the coldness in their voice.
So I called. As Phil listened, I asked them to explain the abortion “procedure”. They were so matter of fact, removed and cold. I could see Phil wavering. After the call, Phil agreed that we could wait a while longer to make the decision.
In the meantime, I knew that I would have this baby. I visited an OB-GYN and asked to have some fetal testing, considering my age. I asked Phil to go with me as I went to UVA to see an in-depth ultrasound. Phil agreed and as he stared at that ultrasound screen, he changed. He could see our baby. Those images pierced his heart and softened the hardness. Phil decided that we should have the baby.
So many months later, little Kyle was born. He was 5 weeks early but healthy and as perfect as any child I’ve ever seen. He is blessing to our family and I can’t imagine my life without him. Phil is a great father. He’s changing diapers and down on the floor with little Kyle. I can see that this son has broadened his heart in a way he never expected. Kyle has also taught me that blessings do come in unexpected ways. His existence has taught me to trust what’s right even when I can’t see how it’s going to work out.
I know Kyle is a God’s miracle because all the facts said that Phil and I wouldn’t have children. But here we stand with a beautiful baby boy that God obviously wanted to have on this planet to do something incredible.
I owe so much to ComfortCare Women’s Health. That appointment and those words that Virginia spoke are the reasons Kyle is here today. If I had called the abortion clinic first, instead of ComfortCare, I shudder to think of the outcome. I’m absolutely sure Kyle wouldn’t be here today.
Blessings,
Dawn
P.S. God bless you for what you do and how you give. You gave me the tools I needed to choose life for my son. You were there for me when confusion and fear had a noose around my neck and the neck of my child. You saved Kyle and you saved our family. Thank you!
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